Shontelle's "Perfect Nighmare" Video Should Have Told The Horrifying Tale Of Her Album Sales

Shontelle's No Gravity may have floated into the the Billboard Top 200 album chart this week at #81 like the limp corpse of a hooker facedown in a muddy river, but at least her label spent $30 on her music video for "Perfect Nightmare," right?



Yeah—the video's a bit of a drag. But I already professed my like for this Rodney Jerkins-produced jam awhile back. And at least it's better than Nadine Coyle's latest trash.

Anyway, I gotta get to Starbucks. If I don't get there right when Shontelle's shift starts, she gets kinda sloppy with the lattes.

The Brits Weren't Feeling Robyn's "Hang With Me"

Robyn's Body Talk Pt. 2 charts better in the UK (#38) than the first part did in June (#47), but her new single "Hang With Me" has a disastrous debut at #54 this week. Only three months ago "Dancing On My Own" made it to #8 on the Brit singles chart.

The rest of it is pretty dull this week. Hurts drop eight positions to #12 on the album chart with Happiness, while their single "Wonderful Life" is still hanging in there in the lower reaches of the Top 40, this week at #38.

Meanwhile, Shontelle (just barely) lands her second UK Top 10 single with "Impossible", which goes in at #10. Here in the States that trash went to #13 and hung around forever until it eventually went platinum.

The U.K. Top 10:

1. "Start Without You" - Alexandra Burke *2 weeks*
2. "Dynamite" - Taio Cruz
3. "Teenage Dream" - Katy Perry
4. "For The First Time" - The Script
5. "Please Don't Let Me Go" - Olly Murs
6. "Love The Way You Lie" - Eminem feat. Rihanna
7. "DJ Got Us Fallin' In Love" - Usher feat. Pitbull
8. "Katy On A Mission" - Katy B
9. "Club Can't Handle Me" - Flo Rida feat. David Guetta
10. "Impossible" - Shontelle *new*

Shontelle Actually Recorded A Decent Song

After somewhat flooding the airwaves with her semi-hit "Impossible" this summer, 2008 Chart Rigger Worst Of The Year honoree Shontelle has now recorded an actual good song for a change in the form of "Perfect Nightmare" (not to be confused with Ne-Yo's current flop "Beautiful Monster").

Rodney Jerkins produced this trash, and it seems having a hit with Lady Gaga and Beyonce's "Telephone" has given Darkchild a flare for dance-pop.



Am I ashamed to admit I like a Shontelle jam? Sure. It's kind of like when you get crabs from a priest—you know you did something bad, but Jesus already knew you were a whore in the first place, so it's okay.

Here's hoping "Perfect Nightmare" is another #36 smash for Shontelle on the U.S. chart!